"I've Been Overlooked My Entire Life" — Emotional Aunt Left Out of Nephew's Birthday Party

TikToker Rizzi (@_rizzi_kizzi) took to TikTok with a heartfelt confessional about not being invited to her nephew's birthday party, a video that has now risen to 1.2 million views.

In a deeply emotional clip, Rizzi opens up about her feelings of being overlooked by her family and TikTok took notice.

Rizzi begins her video with a plea for validation: “I don't know. Tell me if I'm being dramatic, overthinking, or whatever.” She goes on to describe how she had a terrible night and didn't sleep, adding to her already overwhelmed state.

“My sister lives four hours away with her fiancé and their baby, my nephew. I didn't see them for Christmas because they got sick and couldn't make it over.”

The direct-to-camera address takes a heartbreaking turn when Rizzi recounts discovering photos and videos of her nephew’s birthday party on Facebook.

“At first I just thought it was his family, the fiancé's family, 'cause they live in that town. And then I see three of my siblings, additional nieces and nephews, and I hear my parents. And then I was like, what the... Like, they. You went? They live five minutes down the road from me.”

Rizzi texted her family in a group chat, expressing herself: “Baby had a birthday party, and you failed to mention it.” The response she received only added to her distress. “I'm so sorry. Like, we put it together so last minute. It was like a lack of planning thing. We put it together last minute and last minute invited everyone, and they just so happened to, like, make the drive.”

Clearly overlooked, Rizzi questioned why she wasn't included, given that she lives only five minutes away. “They were able to make the drive, so why wouldn't I be able to make the drive?” she asks.

Despite her sister’s apology, the pain of being excluded remained.

“Part of me does think I'm being dramatic, but at the same time, I don't think I'm being dramatic. I just... I've been a last-minute thought my entire life. As the middle child, you're just overlooked all the time. And I've been overlooked my entire life, and it's still true even in my adulthood.”

The top comment, with 20K likes, stated, “The way I would ghost them for months. You are valid.” Another user empathized, “Your feelings are so valid. This would have crushed me.”

A third user added a touch of lightheartedness, saying, “If it’s any consolation you’re such a pretty crier,” responding to the beautiful lighting and Rizzi’s blue eyes. Rizzi responded, “Haha thank you!!!”

Family conflicts are unfortunately common in the United States. A PwC report on family businesses found that while most respondents believed there was a high level of trust within their family, about 30% acknowledged that disagreements occurred from time to time, and 10% said these were regular occurrences.

An article on family conflict resolution highlighted that even conflicts involving only one or two family members can impact the entire family unit.

It recommended involving all affected parties in the resolution process to ensure comprehensive solutions that consider the well-being of the entire family.

While political differences are often cited as sources of family conflict, their actual impact appears to be minimal. According to the American National Election Study, only a small percentage of Americans report substantial harm to their familial relationships due to political disagreements. This suggests that, while differences exist, they generally do not significantly disrupt family relationships.

Rizzi's TikTok confessional sheds light on the emotional toll of feeling overlooked by family. Her story resonated with many, bringing the importance of communication and inclusion within families center stage.

Psychology Today also penned an article delineating the severe emotional distresses associated with "the impact of exclusion" writing: "Being excluded increases the likelihood of someone feeling as though they don’t belong, experiencing low self-esteem, and lacking their sense of control"

In fact, the same piece also highlighted that being excluded from situations is akin to feeling like you're in "physical pain" as the author further explained: "Research has found that feeling excluded is akin to experiencing physical pain, as the same parts of the brain get activated. When working with folks who have experienced this harsh and active form of childhood emotional neglect, I see firsthand the massive amount of emotional pain this causes."

TikTok continues to be a platform for sharing personal stories and fostering community support and Rizzi’s experience serves as a poignant reminder of the power of empathy even in the face of familial differences.