"It Never Leaves You" — Dad Says "Growing Up Poor" Creates Lifelong Scarcity Mindset

A TikToker named Blake (@blakeoftoday) posted a viral TikTok about the long-term effects of growing up poor and how it affected his personality. In a video that includes no audio, just captions, he listed all of the traits he's adopted as a result of growing up without a lot of money as he spends time with his family.

"I used to do this weird thing where I would have half of whatever I ate until I got home just in case just in case what ... I don't know, but it felt important at the time," he writes as he records himself walking with his kids while he pushes a stroller. His clip then cuts to him looking at a cup of food.

"Maybe it was mom paying for groceries with hot checks or fixing whatever the car was making by turning up the Counting Crows in the tape deck it is a weird thing for a kid to feel like they need to do mostly because we never went without ... Moms always find a way," he said, extolling the way his mother found a way to ensure he never went without what he needed.

"But it was close most days and when it wasn't that feeling still didn't go away ... It sits inside of you, kind of like a worry but a lot like a flame these days, we're doing all right. Maybe the fire finally went out but there is a part of me that will always taste the smoke," he states, recording himself eating a dinner he just cooked for him and his kids.

The clip then cuts to him riding on a Peloton, "The thing about being born rich or rather not poor," the caption reads as the camera lens floats throughout his furnished home, "Is that when you are broke, it feels like you are a tourist on a bad trip to a place that you don't belong. And the thing about being born the other way around is that as hard you work to escape it, it's always gonna kinda feel like home."

He adds in a caption for his clip: "This is something I've been thinking a lot about lately. I guess it’s just that Rich Dad, Poor Dad thing but I relate to it so much differently now that I have kids of my own."

(Author talking here) Poor is relative. I grew up collecting cans and bottles to crush them for nickels. Bill collectors called the landline at the house we couldn't afford. Sometimes we didn't have electricity. There was a time we needed to boil water and let it cool down to take baths and showers.

I know what the effects of growing up poor for me are: Anyone who shows the least bit of carelessness with my money or a lack of appreciation for my emotional and financial investments is instantly the enemy.

Superfluous purchases that aren't necessary to one's livelihood or the fulfillment of their dreams are also a distraction and should be treated like a violent cancer.

Once you have something and someone or something attempts to try and take it away, or you even get an inkling that this may happen, you turn into a threatened cat backed into a corner. Your body arches, your eyes narrow, and you find yourself willing to die to protect what was taken from you or you would dream of having as a child, laying down in bed staring at the ceiling under covers that have been passed down multiple times over.

You hate those who embrace victimhood and wear it as a badge of honor. You hate those who glorify suffering as you've become sick of it yourself and had to charm the ignominy of not being able to go to a convenience store with your friends. Not having the change for a can of soda from a vending machine. Having 16-year-old "new" cars in the family that you'd be embarrassed to roll up in next to the shiny new models your classmates would step out of every morning.

I get where Blake's coming from and I believe that it creates a divide between those who were raised on gratitude and the opportunity to have a chance at a better life versus those who wouldn't even begin to know what gratitude looks like in that situation.